Hi everyone. this is my first post here. I am a 32yo male who has been on buprenorphine, everyday, in some form or another for the past 14 years.
Recently this past January my mother passed away unexpectedly. This has been an incredible psychological blow to me and my 2 brothers. We lost our father about 2 years ago now and really weren't completely over that. But besides that, beacause I have no insurance ( the insurance I at the place I work at is rediculously overpriced ), my mother has been my supply of subutex for the past few years. She received 60 a month from her pain management doctor and neither of us took more than a pill a day. Right before she died I was taking about two-thirds, 2/3 of and 8mg pill per day so approximately 5.3mg daily. Since then I've come down to 4mg daily and I have 10 pills remaining. Now the bio-availability of sublingual buprenorphine is around 30% and insufflation around 50%. Obviously IV would be 100% and IM probably not to far behind it in the high 90s if not 100%.
Currently I take 2mg in the morning and 2mg later in the day. I was just curious on your thoughts about IMing the last few pills to stretch the taper longer. I definetly can't IV because absolutely mangled my arm banging a little piece of one. So thats completely of the table. Also I googled shooting subutex and saw a really narly picture of a guy banged it and it really fucked up his hands. However I could get away with IMing it.
I am prescribed xanax at 3mg/day but really before my mom died I was at a pretty consistent 6-8mg (I buy my buddys script, who gets prescribed 60 bars/month, every few months ) a day but recently since my mother died I've been taking way more up to 12mg/day which I'm working on bring back down to 6-8mg. So I have a stash of around 200+ bars and I'm prescribed 90 1mg xanax per month so at least I have that to help, although I gotta bring my dose down because anything over about 12mg doesn't really produce any more sedation/relaxation. I do have pretty severe panic disorder, and up until my mothers passing was using them responsibly albeit at a high dose ( I drive a fork lift for a living so any hint of me being intoxicated would be caught immediately, luckily they haven't noticed my recent dose increase, however it makes me very irritable at work sometimes ). I doubt I'll have a problem bringing it back down to 6-8mg/day relatively quickly, so that when I completely run out of the bupe higher doses of xanax will actually be effective.
The way I look at it at this point is the subs are really doing nothing for me at this point other than insuring I don't use other opioids. The reason I started using them in the first place was because they made me feel awesome, but more importantly they relieved my very severe anxiety ( I was in high school or recently graduated at this point in my life ). At this point I have no desire to use opioids since the xanax with some weed controls my anxiety pretty well, and buying heroin or pills off the street is like playing russian roulette these days. Its time to get off wether I like it or not either way. I'm open to any thoughts/suggestions, feed back of any kind. I have tried in the past to get off on my own and the longest I was ever able to make it to was like maybe 5-6 days, at that point the constant akathisia became to much and I would give in. I don't think I've ever been more scared of anything. I have to work since because my mothers death occured at the beginning of the year I had to use all of my paid time off for the week of the funeral. My employer knows I'm prescribed xanax but doesn't know I also take subs. I have a relationship with my superiors that is good enough where I could explain whats going on and they would understand, but I would rather not have every one at my job ( Its a smaller company so there is alot of gossip ) knowing my buisiness.
So what do you guys think of me IMing the bupe to extend my supply? I have IMed other pills without any real problems other than pain at the injection site but it was never something I made a habit of doing. So If anyone who has experience with shooting bupe could post there toughts I would be incredibly greatful. Also, I was thinking about transitioning to kratom. I have a smoke shop a block from my house that sells really high end kratom. The guy swears buy the shit. He was a major dope head back when oxycontin was first on the market and was getting prescribed massive amounts of shit.
I just would like to thank anyone who responds to this thread in any capacity in advance. Feeling like I'm not going through this alone is what I feel will make it or break it for me. Its awesome that this is a place I can come to with a problem like this since my mom is gone.
Recently this past January my mother passed away unexpectedly. This has been an incredible psychological blow to me and my 2 brothers. We lost our father about 2 years ago now and really weren't completely over that. But besides that, beacause I have no insurance ( the insurance I at the place I work at is rediculously overpriced ), my mother has been my supply of subutex for the past few years. She received 60 a month from her pain management doctor and neither of us took more than a pill a day. Right before she died I was taking about two-thirds, 2/3 of and 8mg pill per day so approximately 5.3mg daily. Since then I've come down to 4mg daily and I have 10 pills remaining. Now the bio-availability of sublingual buprenorphine is around 30% and insufflation around 50%. Obviously IV would be 100% and IM probably not to far behind it in the high 90s if not 100%.
Currently I take 2mg in the morning and 2mg later in the day. I was just curious on your thoughts about IMing the last few pills to stretch the taper longer. I definetly can't IV because absolutely mangled my arm banging a little piece of one. So thats completely of the table. Also I googled shooting subutex and saw a really narly picture of a guy banged it and it really fucked up his hands. However I could get away with IMing it.
I am prescribed xanax at 3mg/day but really before my mom died I was at a pretty consistent 6-8mg (I buy my buddys script, who gets prescribed 60 bars/month, every few months ) a day but recently since my mother died I've been taking way more up to 12mg/day which I'm working on bring back down to 6-8mg. So I have a stash of around 200+ bars and I'm prescribed 90 1mg xanax per month so at least I have that to help, although I gotta bring my dose down because anything over about 12mg doesn't really produce any more sedation/relaxation. I do have pretty severe panic disorder, and up until my mothers passing was using them responsibly albeit at a high dose ( I drive a fork lift for a living so any hint of me being intoxicated would be caught immediately, luckily they haven't noticed my recent dose increase, however it makes me very irritable at work sometimes ). I doubt I'll have a problem bringing it back down to 6-8mg/day relatively quickly, so that when I completely run out of the bupe higher doses of xanax will actually be effective.
The way I look at it at this point is the subs are really doing nothing for me at this point other than insuring I don't use other opioids. The reason I started using them in the first place was because they made me feel awesome, but more importantly they relieved my very severe anxiety ( I was in high school or recently graduated at this point in my life ). At this point I have no desire to use opioids since the xanax with some weed controls my anxiety pretty well, and buying heroin or pills off the street is like playing russian roulette these days. Its time to get off wether I like it or not either way. I'm open to any thoughts/suggestions, feed back of any kind. I have tried in the past to get off on my own and the longest I was ever able to make it to was like maybe 5-6 days, at that point the constant akathisia became to much and I would give in. I don't think I've ever been more scared of anything. I have to work since because my mothers death occured at the beginning of the year I had to use all of my paid time off for the week of the funeral. My employer knows I'm prescribed xanax but doesn't know I also take subs. I have a relationship with my superiors that is good enough where I could explain whats going on and they would understand, but I would rather not have every one at my job ( Its a smaller company so there is alot of gossip ) knowing my buisiness.
So what do you guys think of me IMing the bupe to extend my supply? I have IMed other pills without any real problems other than pain at the injection site but it was never something I made a habit of doing. So If anyone who has experience with shooting bupe could post there toughts I would be incredibly greatful. Also, I was thinking about transitioning to kratom. I have a smoke shop a block from my house that sells really high end kratom. The guy swears buy the shit. He was a major dope head back when oxycontin was first on the market and was getting prescribed massive amounts of shit.
I just would like to thank anyone who responds to this thread in any capacity in advance. Feeling like I'm not going through this alone is what I feel will make it or break it for me. Its awesome that this is a place I can come to with a problem like this since my mom is gone.
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