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Falling for girl at work

M

MoePhantom

Greenlighter
Joined
Mar 3, 2015
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Falling for girl at work
Help me! So there is this girl at my job who got transferred form another state and I've only known her for a month, and I think I'm falling for this person she's amazing and funny and makes me happy and I can tell I make her happy. Sadly due to past failed relationships I'm scared of moving too fast or rejection because I can't stop thinking about her and shes perfect in my eyes! I buy her coffee sometimes and we stay laughing and smiling at each other. I'm gonna take it slow, I'm very worried about the outcome. The outcome is scaring me. Also she has a BF but she doesn't mention him to me and she doesn't act like it towards me. Her bf I heard is in jail im not sure! I'm just worried and idk what to she seems super interested but I don't know if she's justvbeing nice but things are great between us! Any advice would be appreciated!
 
don't mistake kindness for feelings bro. I'm in a similar sitch but I realized I don't have feelings for that girl. I just wanna fuck her. But if she has a bf I wouldn;t get in the way unless she isn't happy in her relationship.

Proceed slowly and don't push anything. IMO taking her to the club n removing some of her inhibitions may reveal her true intentions ;)
 
fall in love with someone who doesn't have a bf, and who isn't a co-worker.
 
^^^ I agree. Respect people's relationships. I'm actually trying to hook up with a girl who has a man atm but she came onto me so it's justified.

But the whole take her to the club thing is legit. I'm not saying roofie her, but a social drink with a co-worker can lead to anything. You'd be more keen on how to move after you find out if she really digs you n shit. Idk how to explain.
 
PotatoMan said:
don't mistake kindness for feelings bro. I'm in a similar sitch but I realized I don't have feelings for that girl. I just wanna fuck her. But if she has a bf I wouldn;t get in the way unless she isn't happy in her relationship.

Proceed slowly and don't push anything. IMO taking her to the club n removing some of her inhibitions may reveal her true intentions ;)
Click to expand...

Yep! That happens all the time, besides, girls like to express sensuality. :)

Take your time and good luck!
 
Working with someone and having a relationship with them isn't a good idea, it may work, but more often than not it ends up straining the relationship. Also she has a bf, it's not really a fun time to meddle in someones love life. And maybe she's just being friendly and has no romantic intentions, if you make a move on her and she isn't interested, it could make working with her very awkward.
 
Please just ask her to do something with you already. She's accepting your coffees and smiling and laughing. If I don't like a guy at least a little bit I avoid him and his coffee. Make it kind of obvious you like her, without spelling out exactly that. If she doesn't back off you should ask her on a casual date, but take it really slow and feel her out on the way. Before you ask though you should establish if she has a boyfriend and where he is. BUT I must say that if she isn't talking about him then she isn't that concerned about him, and therefore you shouldn't be either. Don't be scared, just do it! You don't want to spend the rest of your life wondering, do you?
 
Her boyfriend is in jail? That's just asking for drama if you start dating her...
Do you think he's gonna get out of prison and be cool about this new situation?
 
If you really feel that comfortable with this this person then I feel you would be comfortable enough to ask her straight up whether she has a boyfriend or not. Her not bringing up the fact of whether she has a boyfriend or not really means absolutely nothing in my experience, especially if he is in jail. She may end up using you as a replacement until her boyfriend gets out of jail. This is all just speculation of course but I think for certain in this situation there are some questions that need to be addressed before you get to emotionally involved. I speak from experience not to say this advice is any more helpful then anyone else's.
 
My parents met at work. One of them was the other's boss.

One of them was married but separated.

They got married.

That being said there are all these sexual harrasment laws and stuff and policies against dating coworkers, so if you do pursue this thing be careful. Maybe just test the waters. I find most hot chicks have a boyfriend or at least say they do. Some really hot chicks just go from one boyfriend to the next but still if she is in a long distance relationship, we all know those fail.

Just talk to her a bit and she whether or not she drops any signals. If she doesn't reciprocate to light flirting, I would just drop it. I can see how you might be attracted to someone in the same line of work so if you really do like her then just talk to her and see where things go gradually.
 
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