hello,
first of all this is my first time ever that I write in a forum like this. I'm a 30 yo male from germany (please do excuse my bad english) and I am seeking advice. so I would really appreciate it if you take your time and read this post.
I started smoking weed at age 23 (on a regular basis). 3 years later (age 26) I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. the doctor told me it came from smoking weed. this may be true but there were also alot of other things that mattered in my opinion. and some of them the doc didn't know. let me try to sum them up for you:
- me and my dad lived together in an appartment
- my dad got arrested for drug traffic in another country
- I was always worried that they would come for me too or that the police would raid the appartment at any time
- whenever I smoked weed I was afraid that my neighbours could smell it and would call the police
- I mostly smoked alone
- when I went out into the streets after smoking weed I was always scared that people might find out that I was high
-> I was really in a bad mental state and felt weak and unstable as you can tell by now
- sometimes I had to get weed off some shady dealer who probably cut it with something else
- I was often in the netherlands and smoked many different (and strong) strains
- I also smoked some hash in the last week(got it from that shady dealer) since weed was not available
- and I also have to say that I didn't smoke much weed: in the last year it was 1 joint/day (and before that even less)
when I started hearing voices and felt like I was being watched it never came to me that I was sick. I really thought the voices were real - from neighbours etc. so I didn't stop smoking weed. the last week was the worst.
I haven't slept in days and the voices were more frequently and louder. at the end I didn't know what to do. I went into the hallway and smashed the window. the broken glass got the attention of my neighbour and she called the police and ambulance. they immediately told me that I was sick and that I'm in need of medical attention. so I went to the clinic..
once there i got all kinds of meds to calm me down and get rid of the symptoms. two weeks later I left the clinic.
until now - 4 1/2 years later - I always took my meds and I didn't smoke weed once even though it was really REALLY tough for me.. (especially in the last 2 years since my new girlfriend smokes weed). but I was symptom-free.
I really do want to smoke weed again (only on weekends) but I don't know what to do. my doc told me that smoking weed would ensure that the psychosis would come back again - and not only that - it would be worse than before and even decrease my intelligence.
but my situation completely changed:
- I've got a girlfriend
- I wouldn't smoke alone
- I finished school
- I started boxing
- I do feel mentally (and physically) strong and good (!)
- I have no negative feelings that overweigh
- I don't give a sh*t what anybody thinks about me or if anybody would know that I would be smoking weed
- [...]
what would you guys do? did anybody experience anything similar? and if I decide to smoke again (only on weekends) - would there be some sort of problems because of my meds?
after I left the clinic I took 3 kinds of meds:
Abilify - the neuroleptic drug against the psychosis
Akineton - something against parkinson disease (I took it because of some side effects of abilify)
Trimipramin - antidepressant
today I'm currently only on Abilify (15mg/day).
I hope you guys can help me out. Thanks
crem
first of all this is my first time ever that I write in a forum like this. I'm a 30 yo male from germany (please do excuse my bad english) and I am seeking advice. so I would really appreciate it if you take your time and read this post.
I started smoking weed at age 23 (on a regular basis). 3 years later (age 26) I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. the doctor told me it came from smoking weed. this may be true but there were also alot of other things that mattered in my opinion. and some of them the doc didn't know. let me try to sum them up for you:
- me and my dad lived together in an appartment
- my dad got arrested for drug traffic in another country
- I was always worried that they would come for me too or that the police would raid the appartment at any time
- whenever I smoked weed I was afraid that my neighbours could smell it and would call the police
- I mostly smoked alone
- when I went out into the streets after smoking weed I was always scared that people might find out that I was high
-> I was really in a bad mental state and felt weak and unstable as you can tell by now
- sometimes I had to get weed off some shady dealer who probably cut it with something else
- I was often in the netherlands and smoked many different (and strong) strains
- I also smoked some hash in the last week(got it from that shady dealer) since weed was not available
- and I also have to say that I didn't smoke much weed: in the last year it was 1 joint/day (and before that even less)
when I started hearing voices and felt like I was being watched it never came to me that I was sick. I really thought the voices were real - from neighbours etc. so I didn't stop smoking weed. the last week was the worst.
I haven't slept in days and the voices were more frequently and louder. at the end I didn't know what to do. I went into the hallway and smashed the window. the broken glass got the attention of my neighbour and she called the police and ambulance. they immediately told me that I was sick and that I'm in need of medical attention. so I went to the clinic..
once there i got all kinds of meds to calm me down and get rid of the symptoms. two weeks later I left the clinic.
until now - 4 1/2 years later - I always took my meds and I didn't smoke weed once even though it was really REALLY tough for me.. (especially in the last 2 years since my new girlfriend smokes weed). but I was symptom-free.
I really do want to smoke weed again (only on weekends) but I don't know what to do. my doc told me that smoking weed would ensure that the psychosis would come back again - and not only that - it would be worse than before and even decrease my intelligence.
but my situation completely changed:
- I've got a girlfriend
- I wouldn't smoke alone
- I finished school
- I started boxing
- I do feel mentally (and physically) strong and good (!)
- I have no negative feelings that overweigh
- I don't give a sh*t what anybody thinks about me or if anybody would know that I would be smoking weed
- [...]
what would you guys do? did anybody experience anything similar? and if I decide to smoke again (only on weekends) - would there be some sort of problems because of my meds?
after I left the clinic I took 3 kinds of meds:
Abilify - the neuroleptic drug against the psychosis
Akineton - something against parkinson disease (I took it because of some side effects of abilify)
Trimipramin - antidepressant
today I'm currently only on Abilify (15mg/day).
I hope you guys can help me out. Thanks
crem
