Did she cheat?

[Darth Dude]

I think my wife may have cheated or is cheating on me.

First, some background. She's been going through some things health wise- menopause, thyroid issues, etc. Nothing major, but it had a diminishing effect on her sex drive. We went from having sex 2-3 times a week to once every other month. She always assured me that it was her body, etc. and not me.

Then, a couple of weeks ago she wanted to meet an online male friend for lunch somewhere. It was only a couple hour drive and she invited me to come along. I had a deadline at work to meet, so I declined the offer, but told her to go and enjoy lunch. We've been married 23 years in a totally monogamous relationship and I trust her completely.

She drops by my office on her way to meet this guy. She is dressed to the nines. Heels, makeup, jewelry. She doesn't dress up that much for me on date nights unless it's an anniversary dinner, but I chalked it up to her wanting to make a good first impression.

When she came home she was horny af. We've had sex nearly every night since then, and she's meeting him again next week. I've always told her if she wants an open marriage I'm good with it, but let me know. The thought of her with another guy turns me on, but the thought of her doing it behind my back worries me. What do I do?

 

[mtu mwendawazimu]

Huh. Quite the unexpected ending.

Maybe tell her you know she's cheating, and you'll love her even more if she confesses. That way she has no reason to lie? Not sure. But honestly she may just want sex because the guy turned her on but left her hanging.

Have you told her how it would turn you on?

 

[Darth Dude]

Huh. Quite the unexpected ending.

Maybe tell her you know she's cheating, and you'll love her even more if she confesses. That way she has no reason to lie? Not sure. But honestly she may just want sex because the guy turned her on but left her hanging.

Have you told her how it would turn you on?

Yes, I've told her multiple times that the thought of her with another guy (or girl) is a huge turn on for me.

You may be right. She may have gotten turned on but there was no consummation of the act. Perhaps if I tell her I approve if she wants to do something with him she'll either confess, or follow through with my knowledge. We'll see how it goes.