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Benzos Diazepam Use Out of Control

M

Michael_25

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 19, 2009
Messages
703
I've been taking this shit for nearly 4 years now. I need crazy amounts to gain any effect. Last night I popped 150mg just to "unwind" after a stressful day. And I popped them after my oxycodone wore off. When oh when will my tolerance fall. I remember back in 2012 when 10 mg gave that lofty "I don't give a fuck about the world and things are easy" feeling. I have to source a lot of it on the street as I'm not prescribed enough. My psych still thinks I take my 10 mg a day. I wish ...
 
Your tolerance will never fall unless, maybe, not for certain you taper off and stay off for several years. At 15x your prescribed dose, it'll be a long time until you can "feel" a 10-mg pill, quite possibly never.

You need to taper properly, you're going to need a physician involved and complete honesty. Benzo w/d is pure hell without a proper taper, even then it can be rough. A taper from that dose could take a couple years or more.

I'm thinking you best give up the idea of ever "feeling" a benzo again, except for very short term relief if you're in bad w/ds but that's a very dangerous game. Do not allow yourself to go into w/ds beyond a bit of craving, a little shaky and nervous. Past that it's seizures and possibly death. Brain damage is also likely, esp., if you get into bad w/ds repeatedly. Best would be to begin a Valium taper with a physician guiding you and loose the street connections. Sourcing your own benzos is asking for a nightmare situation.

Be smart, don't carry on just b/c you can, some day you'll seriously regret not beginning your taper after you see a physician.

Do not run out of pills until you can see a doc, which should be ASAFP, in your own best interest. If you run out go to the ER within a few hours of your last dose.
 
^^yup.

m25, this is a rather serious situation that needs to be addressed asap. you absolutely must not run out of pills. you need to do a very slow taper. i think you should speak to your doctor about this, being completely honest. you are never going to able to properly enjoy benzos again IMO. i havent bothered using benzos in ages. i dont enjoy them anymore purely because i cant feel any effect unless i take blackout doses because my tolerance is permanently fucked from abusing them when i was younger.

stop this now, it's gone dangerously far enough.
 
Michael_25 said:
I've been taking this shit for nearly 4 years now. I need crazy amounts to gain any effect. Last night I popped 150mg just to "unwind" after a stressful day. And I popped them after my oxycodone wore off. When oh when will my tolerance fall. I remember back in 2012 when 10 mg gave that lofty "I don't give a fuck about the world and things are easy" feeling. I have to source a lot of it on the street as I'm not prescribed enough. My psych still thinks I take my 10 mg a day. I wish ...
Click to expand...

Hey I just give you my experience. I was taking 180mg a day of Valium at the end of 2012/ 2013. I started taking different benzos in varying amounts around 12 years ago. I've cold turkeyed or tapered 5 times. It took me almost 2 years to get from 180mgs to 0mgs. I did it alone very slowly as no doc gave a fuck and sent me away to die in the mess I'd made myself. Long story short it was brutal of course but I came out relatively unscathed. Luck and being smart by tapering slow which is key saved my ass. I'd prob have died if I hadn't.

Anyways now 10ish months later after some unrelated health problems where a doc falsely diagnosed me with some possibly fatal infection( that's another story I'm fine physically not so much mentally now lol) I during this time started taking 2 mg a day of Valium. I had a ton of left over Valium I swore I never tough again but started taking 2mg a day so I could cope and not go psychotic with panic. I've been taking 2mg a day for 13 days now and today I didn't take any and am stopping b4 this gets out of control again. My point in saying all this is even after having an 12 year habit going off and on but mostly on and up to 180 mgs a day after ten months post taper I feel 2mg like I had never taken any benzos b4 in my life. It's possible. Having said that even after only 13 days I can feel that the old tolerance is starting to build and I can barely feel the 2mg now and I'm sure I'll be feeling w/d off only 13 days due to very real kindling effect.

Best of luck taking your dose to something more resonable. It's hard I know. But once your off you can use them as they are intended to be used
 
Talk to your doctor that prescribes the benzos to you, and tell him or her that you are taking large doses of benzos, addicted to them, and want to get off them safely.

Or if you do not want to tell this to your doctor, check into a rehab or detox centre run by medical professionals, as benzo withdrawal is not something you want to do on your own as people have had seizures and died from it. Good luck.
 
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