Confused about my BDSM relationship. Advice from experienced appreciated.

[LadySub2015]

I am the sub in a BDSM relationship. He and I are not new to each other. We were together before he left the country for work 13 years ago. We broke up. I stayed near family for support while raising our child while he was away. In the beginning it was a "vanilla" relationship. We have always loved eachother. When he returned after 13 years recently we talked openly about what worked and what didn't work in our former relationship.

Our communication is much better. Recently, over the past month he has been away but we have kept in conact. We agreed to live a BDSM relationship. He as the Master and I as the Slave. A couple weeks ago I noticed his responses were not very kind borderline cold and undertones of rude. The last message I sent was a random "I miss you and wish I could wake up next to you" It shows he read it but hasn't responded.

As the submissive I do not know if following up is a proper thing to do. He's out of the country and will return to the US in a few days. I am just waiting for him to contact me. Is that the right thing to do? In my mind I am thinking the rule do not speak unless you are spoken to is in effect. How long will I need to wait before I move on and disconnect myself from him? I can't tell if this is punishment. I just don't understand why he went radio silent.

Any advice is welcome

 

[Mysterie]

i thought bdsm was a sexual thing and that the rest of the time the couple would treat eachother as equals or w/e. at least that is what would make sense to me.

is it unusual for him to not reply to a text you send him straight away? how long has it been since he got the msg? maybe he has been busy with work, or is just tired or stressed out.

 

[tomdpimp]

It could be work? It could be he didn't know what to say? BSDM is about trust. Do you trust him? Why did you agree to be the sub and not the dom? Better question, did you talk about switching roles once in a while?

 

[Doldrugs]

It sounds like this isn't a type of relationship that's rewarding for you.