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Addicted to the idea of PD

StickyChron

StickyChron

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 26, 2011
Messages
324
I don't do drugs very often, if at all these days. However, I find that I have an insatiable desire to learn about them, collect them and just pour over the ideas surrounding them. I feel like this is a bit backwards since all the drugs I possess, I never do.

I don't know if its anxiety that makes me so apprehensive that I never feel like doing them is a good idea, or if its personal guilt or what. I'm a fucking weirdo.

Anyone else like the idea of PD (and drugs in general) more than actually doing them?
 
Me. Absolutely. So much so that it's become my college major.

I spend far more hours researching drugs than actually using them. In fact, during the school year, I hardly even drink, even though most of my friends are partying it up every weekend... But I'm still up every night researching. It is a bit strange, I'll admit.

More recently, though, I've taken to using psychedelics pretty frequently. Too frequently, in my opinion. It's not that it's bad, per say. It's just that I don't really feel like I've been learning much from my experiences lately. I think, with psychedelics at least, it's important not to treat them as a purely recreational drug, but rather as a learning tool that you can apply to analyze yourself and your choices. You wouldn't take the same course four years in a row. Similarly, you shouldn't take psychedelics without giving some time in between to actually experience new things for you to think about.

As for feeling apprehensive, I think you can probably answer that best for yourself. Do you tend to get anxious while on hallucinogens? Have you had some bad trips? Are you generally in an environment with family/friends that you wouldn't want to find out about your usage?
 
Thorns Have Roses said:
Not I, the experience is my primary concern, the rest is ancillary or frivolous.
Click to expand...

If the experience is your primary concern, how do you determine all the preparation that is needed to get the experience you're after? Dosage comes to mind, but also the accumulation of knowledge surrounding something you're interested in.

I thought I wanted to go to school for org chem too, but I quickly realized my first semester that I would be a fool to go into that field. Neuroscience and computer science are my means of understanding the world, at least a little bit.
 
I spend much of my free time reading on this site and Erowid (though Erowid only has so much to read hah). I have no interest in a number of drug classes, but I still read about them anyway. I feel a similar desire to collect them as well, but unfortunately when I do get my hands on PD's, I ingest them all within a month or so of acquiring them. Maybe my stash is just too small hah.

Some people have a collector's mind-set. I'm a history major at university, and I love collecting vinyl (I get OCD about it, if my roommate drops an LP in from the top instead of arching the cover and sliding it in, I get soooo pissed) and old video games. Similarly, I love collecting good pot concentrates and strains, but I end up smoking them up hah. So I guess I'm only capable of collecting non-consumable goods!
 
I do the exact same thing. When it comes to PD or other drugs, I spend a large amount of time daily reading. Whether its synthesis, cultivation, or the like, I read constantly. A few months ago I actually had a shroom grow and have yet to even use them. I was also very excited, after years of looking, to find a san pedro in my local home depot. I bought their entire supply (3 12 in and 3 8 in) and performed an a/b extraction, which I had been eager to try for several months. After I got my final product, I ended up forgetting it in a hotel room and wasnt even that upset.
 
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