My parents are conservative and very strongly anti-drugs. As a teen and young adult I wasn't aware of feeling any guilt regarding my drug use. At that time I went completely over the top and almost completely rejected my parents, and all of their values, and all of the things they had tried to instill in me. This was about more than just drugs, there was a whole lot of other issues going on too, but that was a large part of it.
It's taken me quite some time to realise that in the end my parents were actually right about so many things, and much of what they stood for and believe in, and instilled in me, was all right and all good in the end (apart from our extremely polarised views on drugs.)
So I have gone all round the houses, in a very hard and tortuous route, only to finally end up re-finding myself and becoming just like my parents in many ways.
I definitely have my own moral code regarding drugs. I know on these police reality TV type documentaries they often over-simplify things, and try to make out that people who break the law by taking drugs for example are arrogant and believe that the law does not apply to them. I actually don't believe that I am arrogant, or that the law does not apply to me. I know the law does apply to me as much as anyone else, but out of a feeling of necessity and need I believe that I would be foolish and naive to deny myself the benzos that give me a hugely enhanced quality of life, compared to what it would be otherwise. I am quite prepared to face the consequences if my drug use does ever land me in legal troubles. I have no guilt about it what so ever. If I was wealthy and / or middle class I'd be able to afford to pay a private psychiatrist for a monthly script. The law is wrong with regard to drugs in my opinion. I have seen how laws change over time, depending on whatever political and social pressures are prevailing at the time. Laws are not absolute moral rights in many cases in my opinion. I am absolutely a libertarian with regard to drugs. In most other ways my morality is more or less in line with the current laws and christian values.
It depends on the manner of drug use though. I mean, if I was to continue some of the habits i developed during the Mephedrone era, like quitting my jobs / getting sacked, preferring to go on long wreck head binges and many all nighters listening to music and perving all night long. I mean that kind of drug use was not something I could honestly be proud of myself for continuing with that as a permanent way of life. I'm glad that stuff is behind me, it did lead to guilt, erosion of self esteem etc no matter how deeply buried it was by stimulant binges and heavy benzo and kratom and some opiate use too.
