T+0:00 - 10:06am - Decided to make some bad decisions and I ended up with 7.5mg hydrocodone X 8. I have taken 3 of those pills, or 22.5mg, and am now awaiting effects.
A brief back story during this interlude:
As a teen I was diagnosed with burkitts lymphoma, and was soon on rather regular doses of hydrocodone pills for pain management. Something like 7.5-15mg every 4-6 hours.
Eventually I began to realize that these things can get you high. So I started saving then up, taking 3-4 at a time and having an amazing time. Often smoking cannabis alongside it. And it was amazing.
. I became psychologically addicted, and physically addicted in a minor sense. I just got a little bit of restlessness in my legs and extremities when I finally stopped taking them. I had gotten caught taking many more than the prescription called for from the bottle. I took something like 12 pills out of a bottle of 60 and somehow thought I wouldn't get caught. Well I did. And then it was a downward spiral that ended with me committing some not-so-great acts, but that is another story.
Mainly what I'm trying to convey is my tolerance at the time. I have not taken any opiates besides one large dose of loperamide a few months ago and 15mg of oxy 3 weeks ago. Essentially it has been many months, 5-6 maybe, since I've had a relatively high dose of opiates. I'm going to enjoy the 22.5mg in my system right now and wait until tonight to take 37.5mg and smoke some weed with it ;D
It shall be a grand ol' time. Provided that this does not lead me down a bad path.
But, as ridiculous as it sounds, I've walked this road for a long time, and the journey doesn't really get easier. Someday I know that my fervent drug taking will catch up with me.. And really I feel it already has. Nearly two years into using opiates I am a thief, a borderline sociopath, and a verifiable genius. I was none of those before I began taking drugs.. And to be honest I would do it all again for the insight that I have gained about the world around me and myself. Drugs can be wonderful doorways to the expansion of one's conscience and intellectual horizons; they can also be trap doors that send you spiraling down into the depths of depravity, deceit, and your own personal hell.
. One must weigh the risks before they make any hasty decisions in the world of drugs. Because that first decision is by far the hardest one. After that it gets much, much easier to say yes... Even if you know that someday it will be the end of you.
So, that's my warning and story... I'll jump back into the effects.
T+0:22 - 10:28am - I am definitely starting to feel.. Something. It's a hard feeling to describe if you've never taken hydrocodone before. That's because hydrocodone is an opiate that, to me, melts me around the edges (it feels like the high starts around my body and melts in) and begins to provide a gentle, breeze-like euphoria.
It's the feeling of sunlight streaming through your window after the nicest night of sleep ever. Complete relaxation, that blissful feeling in your bones and muscles that seems so natural and right.. Tempered with the light giddiness of waking up to a gentle cascade of sunlight falling near your head.
The setting im in right now/today is at my house on thanksgiving. Right now I am in the restroom and I'm about to take a shower. After that I will go hang out with my family and eat a delicious thanksgiving lunch at noon. It will generally be a really pleasant environment because I've fooled my loved ones into thinking that my days of drug use are far behind me. They would never suspect a thing, and I've become rather adept at hiding my inner feelings.
It has occurred to me that some of my statements appear to have a blatant disregard for the feelings and experiences of others. Like I said.. Opiates turn me into a cold, calculating, rational automaton that could do anything sinister that I put my mind to. But I'm not far down the rabbit hole yet.
I might add that I have had 1 cup of coffee this morning about 45 minutes before I took my pills. It didn't do anything except halt caffeine withdrawals (I'm addicted to caffeine, anywhere from 200-500mg a day). So I'm going to drink some yerba mate tea for energy which contains 1 1/3 tsp of yerba mate extract. If I remember I'll post the brand at the bottom in footnotes or something. I'll be back in a bit after I shower.
T+0:46 - 10:52am - It's a feeling that turns my legs to jelly, and gives my eyes a vacant and glazed look. Only if you're looking for it, though, and only when I'm alone and let my facial expression exist how it naturally does. My eyes droop and a faint smile plays at my lips while my body turns to jelly and my brain is bathed in a warm opiated glow.
I'm a bit more alert than I would be otherwise and I can tell that the yerba mate tea is helping me keep my eyes open. But it increases the euphoria if anything. If I stopped moving and closed my eyes I could definitely nod out right now. It wouldn't be a powerful nod, but I could definitely make it happen. Time to go sit in the living room with my family and begin the great social game.
T+ 1:02 -11:08am - These opiates seem to be causing a bit of bruxism. It could be due to the increased amounts of dopamine being released by the opiates in my brain. That happens because I've been anticipating this high, getting my brain ready by being excited, and all the while the anticipation causes a build up of dopamine and serotonin in my vesicles.
Opiates themselves release a bit of dopamine because of the pleasure your receive, and mix that with the dopamine reward of getting something you desperately want has me feeling euphoric and invincible. My face is a little tight like my jaw which is something I've always noticed with opiates. Sometimes if I take too much oxycodone (never had it happen with hydrocodone or codeine) I will wake up with intense jaw pain from clenching so hard during the night and painful tension headaches from the same. I now know never to take a lot of oxy before I go to sleep. I wonder if bruxism with opiates is a common thing, because I never really hear about it but I experience it all the time.
*thinking about that now, it could have just been an increase in intracranial pressure. I really butchered that scientific description up there*
Come to think of it however.. I never clench my jaw when I'm nodding, but I still get the tightness in my face and head.
Curioser and curioser.
T+8:39 - 6:45pm - So around noon me and my family sat down to eat a delicious thanksgiving lunch, and it was just that: delicious. The effects were still going strong and I ate tons of food with a huge smile on my face and got a lot of people to laugh, joke, and have a good time. It was rather festive.
The effects stayed practically the same until 2pm, when I felt it start to ebb and leave me groggy and aching in the head. I was so tired from the food and fading effects that I took a nap. I slept from 2:30 to 4:07 and woke up feeling mostly sober. I have been completely sober for about 2 and a half hours and it has been 8 hours and some change since my last dose.
I'm going to take 37.5mg of hydrocodone, wait for it to kick in, and then smoke some cannabis. Will report back with details.
Here the report ends, but I'm working on that experience report at the moment. 37.5mg of hydrocodone and about .5g smoked cannabis was an amazing time. After a 7 month break from nodding I was dipped into the ether and reborn..
Hope you liked it
A brief back story during this interlude:
As a teen I was diagnosed with burkitts lymphoma, and was soon on rather regular doses of hydrocodone pills for pain management. Something like 7.5-15mg every 4-6 hours.
Eventually I began to realize that these things can get you high. So I started saving then up, taking 3-4 at a time and having an amazing time. Often smoking cannabis alongside it. And it was amazing.
. I became psychologically addicted, and physically addicted in a minor sense. I just got a little bit of restlessness in my legs and extremities when I finally stopped taking them. I had gotten caught taking many more than the prescription called for from the bottle. I took something like 12 pills out of a bottle of 60 and somehow thought I wouldn't get caught. Well I did. And then it was a downward spiral that ended with me committing some not-so-great acts, but that is another story.
Mainly what I'm trying to convey is my tolerance at the time. I have not taken any opiates besides one large dose of loperamide a few months ago and 15mg of oxy 3 weeks ago. Essentially it has been many months, 5-6 maybe, since I've had a relatively high dose of opiates. I'm going to enjoy the 22.5mg in my system right now and wait until tonight to take 37.5mg and smoke some weed with it ;D
It shall be a grand ol' time. Provided that this does not lead me down a bad path.
But, as ridiculous as it sounds, I've walked this road for a long time, and the journey doesn't really get easier. Someday I know that my fervent drug taking will catch up with me.. And really I feel it already has. Nearly two years into using opiates I am a thief, a borderline sociopath, and a verifiable genius. I was none of those before I began taking drugs.. And to be honest I would do it all again for the insight that I have gained about the world around me and myself. Drugs can be wonderful doorways to the expansion of one's conscience and intellectual horizons; they can also be trap doors that send you spiraling down into the depths of depravity, deceit, and your own personal hell.
. One must weigh the risks before they make any hasty decisions in the world of drugs. Because that first decision is by far the hardest one. After that it gets much, much easier to say yes... Even if you know that someday it will be the end of you.
So, that's my warning and story... I'll jump back into the effects.
T+0:22 - 10:28am - I am definitely starting to feel.. Something. It's a hard feeling to describe if you've never taken hydrocodone before. That's because hydrocodone is an opiate that, to me, melts me around the edges (it feels like the high starts around my body and melts in) and begins to provide a gentle, breeze-like euphoria.
It's the feeling of sunlight streaming through your window after the nicest night of sleep ever. Complete relaxation, that blissful feeling in your bones and muscles that seems so natural and right.. Tempered with the light giddiness of waking up to a gentle cascade of sunlight falling near your head.
The setting im in right now/today is at my house on thanksgiving. Right now I am in the restroom and I'm about to take a shower. After that I will go hang out with my family and eat a delicious thanksgiving lunch at noon. It will generally be a really pleasant environment because I've fooled my loved ones into thinking that my days of drug use are far behind me. They would never suspect a thing, and I've become rather adept at hiding my inner feelings.
It has occurred to me that some of my statements appear to have a blatant disregard for the feelings and experiences of others. Like I said.. Opiates turn me into a cold, calculating, rational automaton that could do anything sinister that I put my mind to. But I'm not far down the rabbit hole yet.
I might add that I have had 1 cup of coffee this morning about 45 minutes before I took my pills. It didn't do anything except halt caffeine withdrawals (I'm addicted to caffeine, anywhere from 200-500mg a day). So I'm going to drink some yerba mate tea for energy which contains 1 1/3 tsp of yerba mate extract. If I remember I'll post the brand at the bottom in footnotes or something. I'll be back in a bit after I shower.
T+0:46 - 10:52am - It's a feeling that turns my legs to jelly, and gives my eyes a vacant and glazed look. Only if you're looking for it, though, and only when I'm alone and let my facial expression exist how it naturally does. My eyes droop and a faint smile plays at my lips while my body turns to jelly and my brain is bathed in a warm opiated glow.
I'm a bit more alert than I would be otherwise and I can tell that the yerba mate tea is helping me keep my eyes open. But it increases the euphoria if anything. If I stopped moving and closed my eyes I could definitely nod out right now. It wouldn't be a powerful nod, but I could definitely make it happen. Time to go sit in the living room with my family and begin the great social game.
T+ 1:02 -11:08am - These opiates seem to be causing a bit of bruxism. It could be due to the increased amounts of dopamine being released by the opiates in my brain. That happens because I've been anticipating this high, getting my brain ready by being excited, and all the while the anticipation causes a build up of dopamine and serotonin in my vesicles.
Opiates themselves release a bit of dopamine because of the pleasure your receive, and mix that with the dopamine reward of getting something you desperately want has me feeling euphoric and invincible. My face is a little tight like my jaw which is something I've always noticed with opiates. Sometimes if I take too much oxycodone (never had it happen with hydrocodone or codeine) I will wake up with intense jaw pain from clenching so hard during the night and painful tension headaches from the same. I now know never to take a lot of oxy before I go to sleep. I wonder if bruxism with opiates is a common thing, because I never really hear about it but I experience it all the time.
*thinking about that now, it could have just been an increase in intracranial pressure. I really butchered that scientific description up there*
Come to think of it however.. I never clench my jaw when I'm nodding, but I still get the tightness in my face and head.
Curioser and curioser.
T+8:39 - 6:45pm - So around noon me and my family sat down to eat a delicious thanksgiving lunch, and it was just that: delicious. The effects were still going strong and I ate tons of food with a huge smile on my face and got a lot of people to laugh, joke, and have a good time. It was rather festive.
The effects stayed practically the same until 2pm, when I felt it start to ebb and leave me groggy and aching in the head. I was so tired from the food and fading effects that I took a nap. I slept from 2:30 to 4:07 and woke up feeling mostly sober. I have been completely sober for about 2 and a half hours and it has been 8 hours and some change since my last dose.
I'm going to take 37.5mg of hydrocodone, wait for it to kick in, and then smoke some cannabis. Will report back with details.
Here the report ends, but I'm working on that experience report at the moment. 37.5mg of hydrocodone and about .5g smoked cannabis was an amazing time. After a 7 month break from nodding I was dipped into the ether and reborn..
Hope you liked it